Birthday Blues

It is my 31st birthday! That should be a happy thing right?

This time of year is often busy for me, but this week has been unusually busy. So we are getting a new heating/cooling system put into our house (our old furnace broke on the first day of snow last year). With all the work going on at our home our cats and dog and rat have been at the church with me during the day. I have also just recently started a second job at a yarn shop, which fills in many of my hours.

So today, my birthday, is also the weeknight that we have all of our kid's programs at the church. So I will be working for my birthday. That is not enough to make me sad though, because typically I love the nights that I am with the high schoolers. I think a part of it is that no one at the church ever remembers that it is my birthday, even when year after year I tell them. So far today the only one to tell me happy birthday is my husband (good man!) Even having my birthday forgotten is not enough to make me sad. I think what it is was that I just found out today that my friend (the new mother with the husband who had a tumor found in his brain), her husband died yesterday. That makes me sad, to lose someone so young. To expect a life time together, creating and caring for your family, and to have it all come to an end so fast. That makes me sad, and I suppose that the rest is just a bit of self-pity, and a generous helping of exhaustion.